Meagan CP#2

Miyamoto-san and I met up the week before last in CIES as she needed help on her composition assignment.  The assignment was an argumentative essay and her topic was juvenile criminals should be convicted as adults, especially for severe offenses.  The essay was well-structured in that she made sure to provide examples and use plenty of supporting details.  However, she had a few structure errors in her sentences (i.e. some words were in the wrong order) and had some trouble finding the right words/sentences to explain how juvenile criminals could benefit from harsher punishment and why in her last paragraph and conclusion.  We exchanged some example sentences like, "If judges convict juveniles to a stricter degree, then this will deter repeat juvenile offenders from convicting more crime." and "It is imperative to charge to juveniles as adults because a serious crime equally affects the victim and their family despite the criminal's age, thus conviction should be equal across the board." We kept tweaking it until finally the last two paragraphs were cohesive with the rest of the essay.  Before I had to leave to go to class, we wrapped up by re-reading the essay a couple times to check for any missed spelling or grammatical errors.  Overall, she had written a strong position on why juvenile crimes need to receive harsher punishment, so we didn't need to take too much time making it a superb essay to turn in during her class.